Ministries of Fucking Church

The Fucking Kitchen

Led by our founder and ordained chef, The Fucking Kitchen feeds the hungry, the high, the holy, and the heretical. We break bread and social barriers alike.

The Ministry of Discord

Honoring Eris, the Holy Mother of Chaos. We preach absurdity, serve hot dogs on Fridays, and throw golden apples into every system we find.

The Dudeist Abide-istry

Sometimes you eat the bear, sometimes the bear eats you. This ministry encourages chill vibes, deep rugs, and the sacred rite of White Russians. The Dude abides—and so do we.

SubGenius Outreach

We honor J.R. "Bob" Dobbs with slack. We evangelize nonsense with purpose. Pipe-smoking is optional but highly encouraged.

Dark Light Ministry

For our LaVeyan siblings, Wiccans, Pagans, and fellow travelers of the spiritual fringe. This ministry welcomes rituals, rites, sabbats, moon chants, and total fucking autonomy.

Abrahamic Chaos Initiative

We mix the incense of Eastern Orthodoxy, the call to prayer of Islam, and the wisdom of Rabbinical Judaism into our sacred soup. Respect, remix, rejoice.